Tuesday, August 26, 2014
Today I felt as though the thoughts were like rushing waters after the dam has burst. I reflect on the day and how I question the vulnerability of my body as I went into surgery. I thought about what cancer has been in my life since my initial diagnosis in 2010 and who I am because of this disease. Not only did I go through a double mastectomy, chemotherapy and radiation, I also went through divorce and recovery from addiction as I went through treatment for cancer all at the same time.
The surgeon thinks the tumors that were removed are scar tissue and that I do not have to worry about cancer for now <sigh>. The thoughts trickle into streams of relief as well as sadness for what cancer has brought into my life. Is the greater good to show others how to take the fear of such a diagnosis and turn it into a love that can heal from the inside-out?
“Then the day will come to you when you will find, your thoughts have healed you inside. You will then be able to feel the source that lies within your mind. This source will bring you the sun that will shine inside. How do you show the spirits how this makes you feel? This source you hold as a secret will force you to decide. Do you seek for more and learn what it can do? All the spirits watch to see what you will do.” –Love by Lisa Hynes
Monday, August 25, 2014
**(Pray for me at 7:30 am)
I feel the strength stirring inside me as I prepare for tomorrow. I look behind me at all the stops along the way that have filled me full of love. With each time I stop for love, I move forward to find more. I realize that it is not about the people who have come and gone in my life. It is about what I took from those experiences that makes me who I am today.
It gives me strength to get up off my knees as I humbly ask my God to give me courage to face my fears today; even as I recall the events that were not what they appeared to be because of who I am today. I know that it was all necessary to get to this place inside my thoughts. I see the one constant in all this and it is my thoughts.
“When we have courage, the strength will come like dew that is lifted by the morning sun rise. Vocalizing our truth will become important as the strength will stir the feelings of integrity and pride for all we stand for in our world. The anxiety and fear will disappear as we find that through our window of desperation Something Greater brings us a new perspective on who we are and what we are doing in our life.” –Desperation by Lisa Hynes
I was woken up at 3:33am and then again at 5:55am with thoughts of the prophet Jesus in my mind. It is said the he is the son of God. He healed the blind and raised the dead. He broke the barrier between the spirit world and this dimension. He said that what he did, we could also. He changed the physical world with his thoughts of faith in what God is capable of doing.
I am amazed at the things that Jesus did and taught while he was in human form. He healed others that were instantly changed by his touch and his words. How does faith cure the sick and heal the dying? Jesus said that what he did, we could do also. He is the key for me to unlock the door of how to heal. Just as I look to the angels for protection, I look to Jesus as the way to heal. He is an example of what the spirit is capable of in human form. He defied gravity and walked on water. Many say that these stories are not true. All I know is that I experience a feeling of hope when thinking that Jesus taught a way to worship the Creator of All and bring this source into this dimension to love and heal all who will believe. Do I dare to believe that this world that Jesus talked about can heal the dying?
I recall the day I realized that there is something out there listening to my thoughts. I was at first scared and looked around to see how a prayer I said over and over appeared in a painting. I questioned the probability of such an experience to be slim-to-none. As my awareness grew, events became like a movie in my head. I looked for verification that I had not lost my mind. I started to define the thoughts that caused me fear. I went back to the beginning of those fears. As I noticed the greater good of the cycle from fear to love, I realized I was different after the completion of each cycle. The leap in my awareness was astronomical as I found peace within my thoughts. The more I felt this presence all around me, the better I felt.
I thought I wanted to die when I found out I had breast cancer. I was alone inside my thoughts at that time and I had no purpose within myself. Today I sit alone yet I am not alone and I know that I am creating in this dimension with a world that I have yet to understand. I now have a purpose and I know that my thoughts about who I am are all I have. All the expectations placed upon me do not define who I am with “Me”.
I choose to believe that Jesus broke the barrier between the spirit world and our dimension. I choose to believe that Jesus healed the sick and raised the dead because of the documented accounts from those who witnessed his abilities. I choose to see my thoughts and beliefs in these occurrences as a way to heal myself.
Do I dare to believe that a man named Jesus showed us how to heal? I know I feel better by believing that such things can occur and I have healed myself from cancer and lupus after becoming aware that there is a world within my thoughts that alters my reality.
This time I have God that is showing me how to accept right where I am as I look within a world that shows me a different view. A view that is full of love and heals me inside, if only for the day.
“If you look inside the view that shows you another place, you will see the part of you that shows you all the love. This place will be inside your mind and only you can find it. All the misery that you can hold will then become a dream. The view will change in the blink of an eye as you find the love. The colors will become a clue that you have found this view. “—The View by Lisa Hynes
Saturday, August 23, 2014
My thoughts shine bright like the afternoon sun with shadows of despair as Tuesday’s surgery looms in the distance. I see myself walking onward with glimpses of my faith that sparkle as the butterfly that passes by. The shadows of dread cover parts of my path today as I prepare for what lies before me. Regardless of the outcome of this surgery, I will be forever changed. If it is not cancer, I will be making new promises to the God of my understanding regarding the care I give to my body (or lack thereof) as I find a new appreciation for who I am in human form.
Do I dare to think that I may have to make the decision to go through chemotherapy yet again? Either path I look towards on this journey as I prepare for Tuesday, I ensure that I carry the necessities. I feel numb as I take yet another trip into the thoughts of cancer in my mind. I have my faith that I carry with me at all times. This faith is the light that I shine into the darkness that lies all around me. I have freewill to stand in this light or to move into the darkness of uncertainty that shadows my faith.
I have freewill to develop any sort of relationship I choose with the source of all creation. My God lets me grow any way I choose. As I stand at the crossroad with my faith shining brightly, I look towards both roads with one leading towards cancer and I know that whichever path I travel on Tuesday, I am not alone this time.
I am forever changed because my God is there all around me shining through the darkness of uncertainty. I look at the edges of the darkness and see my fear as the way to gain strength to move forward because of the darkness. There is nothing else to do but keep moving on and I choose to view the crossroad of this realization as the next step on my spiritual journey in my attempts to develop the highest level of awareness I can find while in human form on my path towards love.
“The thoughts that lead you to this path of fear will trail all the way back to a time when you had no knowledge of how to fight against the fear. You experienced the fear from the beginning to find the part inside of you that can grow into a love that is ever evolving in your life. How can you know the love without knowing what it is not?”—The Sword and the Shield
Today I fight with my thoughts and it is taking great effort to look inside myself for meaning. It is like a battle in my mind with all my fears at the forefront trying to conquer what little serenity I have. It is as if a force is trying to break my faith that is dark and full of anger. As I muster up the thoughts of who I am because of my faith, slowly the serenity comes into view. It gallops out into the sun where my faith lies and it holds the sword of honesty and the shield of hope and faith as it battles with the darkness that lies inside of me.
The sword of honesty cuts through the anger that I hold because of my past and because of my up-coming surgery. It shows me the greater good of this thing called life. The serenity gallops onward like the grace of a horse that rides away after the battle has been won. I stand in the middle of the battlefield looking in awe at what this horse of serenity is doing for me. The sword of honesty cuts through all the pain and anguish that now lies at my feet. The shield of hope and faith is now in my hand shining proudly for all to see.
The darkness curls up in the corner of my mind waiting for the opportunity to seep into my soul and take the spark of life I have found to turn it into a storm that rages inside of me. I look towards the God of my understanding who promises to give me the wisdom to know what I can change and the courage to carry those thoughts for change out into action. As long as I remind myself that all I do is for my Creator, the protection surrounds me to do just that for today only.
I see this horse of serenity galloping around me all in white and the rider is an extension of my God that forms into an image that I can understand. The rider is the spirit of God that leads me into a place within my thoughts that sparkles with all the faith that I can find today.
As I stand in the middle of the battlefield, all the regrets and all the thoughts of not being worthy enough lie around this field reflecting back to me as the parts that are dying and have no life left inside of me. I breathe in the air and stand with my hands outstretched towards the sky. The spirit swirls around me in the wind and as I breathe, the horse of serenity becomes a part of me.
This graceful white horse of serenity gallops around me to ensure that all my dying regrets and thoughts of worthlessness that lie on the battlefield in my mind do not affect this feeling of peace that now consumes me.
The rider on the horse of serenity holds the sword of honesty that cuts through any thoughts that try to touch the peace that I have found. As I stand with my arms outstretched to the sky with the shield of hope and faith that shine in the sunlight of my path, I know that this part of me can never be taken away by anyone because my God promises me that I am never alone even in my thoughts.
“With good intensions as you seek for love, the pain of yesterday turns into strength and courage for today. There will come a day when you will understand how all this pain brought you to a level within your mind that you no longer need to suffer with your thoughts.”—The Shield of Love by Lisa Hynes
Thursday, August 21, 2014
I woke up knowing that my thoughts can make or break me today. I know that if I think thoughts that lead me to an idea that this surgery will result in finding out I have cancer, I will make myself sick. I choose to think that everything will be “fine” and my responsibility in all this is to stay positive.
My thoughts are pulled into my past and all that brought me here. My regrets are turning into the strength of who I am because of them. The God of my understanding is a healing God full of love and patience. As the darkness tries to crawl into my soul, my Creator brings me love to make all new with light, love and healing. The awareness of this moment swirls around me with the air that blends the spirit behind my thoughts. I try to take all doubts and turn them into the knowledge of how my thoughts make my reality. The healing begins inside my thoughts and I want to be the one to say my faith in my God healed me and I will not have sickness any more.
I remind myself that if I ask, I will receive what lies behind my intensions. I know my intensions are to allow the God of my understanding into my life and “Thy will be done”. I am empty without God and I never want to feel that experience again. I am here with my past that blends into who I am and I look towards my future with anticipation of what my God is leading me towards.
I reach out at every moment to serve my God in whatever way I can show my faithfulness. There is no room in my thoughts for anything else and my belief in this takes the spirit and intertwines it with my soul for the feeling that spreads throughout my body. I am nothing without Something Greater and I seek every waking moment to find something that reflects the language my Creator speaks to me in a way that I can understand.
Life feels like a riddle some days and today had many riddles to study on my search for answers. At the end of the day, I looked at my actions and knew that I gave my best in all affairs I was blessed to be a part of. I am right where Something Greater wants me to be and nowhere else will do.
“The spirit of love will bring you one type of feeling and thought while the spirit of fear will bring you another. You will go back and forth with thoughts and feelings trying to decide who you are and you will find that you are right where you are and nothing more.”-- Right Where You Are by Lisa Hynes
Wednesday, August 20, 2014
Today there is a stillness in the air all around me. I remind myself that the spirit lies between my thoughts and emotions and I see a see-saw in my mind. How do I balance the thoughts and feelings that make me question why I am here at this moment? Which way do I go today in my mind? I go back to the times when I didn’t believe in anything except what I could see in front of me. The lack of my awareness at those times in my life resulted in my missing so much that glows and sparkles all around me.
I consciously know that I have to train my thoughts to not go back to the times when I had no belief in Something Greater or in myself for that matter. I grasp for the connection to my higher power and remind myself that my purpose here lies in an unseen world. I can choose to sit in the thoughts of turmoil about “what if?” and look at all the horrible events that have occurred and are occurring in our world or I can seek for peace inside myself as I look towards how to take this moment and make it something new.
How do I make the day feel new when I feel so worn and beaten down? The gratitude in what I have today brings me a feeling of love. The feeling of love makes all seem new. I breathe in the air and know that the promises of what Something Greater is doing in my life lies inside the part of me that takes my thoughts and emotions and balances them on the scale of life. This is the part of me that takes my actions and brings me gifts that are promised because of my thoughts that have turned into actions. My faith in those promises will bring me the courage to seek for more because of this faith. The promises will become the gifts that have been spoken of throughout history. My faith in this process will heal me from the inside-out as I prepare for surgery on Tuesday.
“For those of us who choose to travel the path with Something Greater, we will hear the voice inside verify that what we see around us is a result of what we think it is and we will have the choice to acknowledge that it is from Something Greater and that these gifts and messages are there for the awakening on our path to Something Greater.” The Gifts by Lisa Hynes
Tuesday, August 19, 2014
Today the story is about me. I woke up in the moment of not thinking about the word cancer. I thanked God for yet another day and remembered my up-coming surgery. As I searched my mind for answers to find peace in my then anxiety-ridden thoughts, I recalled that I am right where I am supposed to be. Acceptance of this thought gave me a calming-effect. I looked towards the sun to see the beginning of a new day. My belief in what I am doing in this body got me out of the bed so I could push forward to create a world of peace around me if only for the day.
The thought that I help others find peace through my experiences helped me forget my own inner struggles. I look for the world that is outside of my every day view to give me purpose as I see much suffering all around me. I look towards the creation of the moment and the magnitude of my presence. As I pondered on this thought, I began to feel a presence all around me that gave me strength to look for something more.
The day was filled with magic as I saw experience after experience that reflected my faith in a day that had a purpose. People brought me messages on my journey through the day and as I pushed aside the fear of this up-coming surgery, I created my heaven for the moment.
The extensions of the God of my understanding did not show up as a lightning bolt. The language of my God came to me through the dragon fly that flew in front of my windshield on my way to work. God came to me in the form of the baby that I saw in the elevator sleeping with not a care in the world. God came to me in the conversation with the stranger that complimented my hair.
Today I found myself in an area of the hospital that I never venture into at the oddest moment and met a woman that I had never seen before. She prayed with me and we both stated that we did not know why we were there at that particular time. I told her what the grace of God meant to me as she said that she was writing about grace in a paper. I don’t remember why she was writing about grace but I told her to read my story called “The Beginning” in my blog if she wanted a story about what the grace of God did for me. I went away from that experience thinking she was there for me yet wondered if I gave her something in return as well.
I was very aware today that all is made from the spirit into physical form and today I experienced it in people.
“You will see the spirit world that brings the rays of the sunshine. It will start as a feeling and turn into a thought and the window of desperation will open to this world. The moment will become a connection as you take the knowledge of who you are and blend it with the air. You will one day grasp the understanding that the path to Something Greater is found in your conscious level of existence that you connect to in an unseen world.” The Making of the Moment by Lisa Hynes
Monday, August 18, 2014
I continue to write every day and I am in the process of making the changes for the gallery that holds the text for the body of the book. I planned on having all the changes completed by this past weekend. Unfortunately, I received news this past Friday that delayed my plans. I will be going through surgery on August 26th at 9:30am with the hopes that what is removed is not cancer "again". This experience has brought me to a new place within my thoughts as to why I feel as though I am going in circles. It is nothing like when I had a double mastectomy but it brings back all those old feelings. Part of me is struggling with the whole thought of death and why I am faced with possible cancer yet again. All the anxiety that was finally gone after two years since my last scare slowly seeps into my thoughts. I go back and forth within my mind as I remind myself that I am experiencing all this for spiritual growth. Why do I have to experience such fear that my body may have to go through chemotherapy and radiation again? How do I keep the faith in Something Greater that I write about every day? I tell myself that I am faced with this experience because it is leading me to a greater connection in my relationship with the God of my understanding.
I have decided to write my thoughts down every day as I go through this procedure and how it affects me as a result. Today I have been sad. Yesterday felt like a dream. Saturday I worked and was so busy with preparing for school with my daughter that I didn’t have time to think about it. Friday, August 15, was when I was told that I needed to have two spots removed from the same area that I had the cancer back in 2010. The difference this time is that God is in my life and the hope and faith of what is promised as long as I allow God to take over my decisions brings me a purpose in all this mess. I am taking only the day this time and not worrying about “what if”. I am not shutting the door on the past nor having any regrets. I am reminding myself that I am right where I am supposed to be. Acceptance brings me to a peace inside as I fight with the anxiety of the terrible word called “Cancer”.
This time I can talk about what I am thinking and I am reaching out to others. I am asking for help instead of sitting in the darkness of my thoughts. So here I sit needing to rest for tomorrow that will be filled with patients who are faced with death and dying and I think about death and what it means to me. Tomorrow will come and I will be different yet the surgery date will be there in the back of my mind. I will get up and pray and dedicate a part of my morning to write for Something Greater and I will go through another day with the intentions to help others in any way that I can. I will seek for answers within every waking moment and the stranger that smiles as passing by me may be the one sign that I will need to get through that moment.
Today I start a different story about me and my journey through yet another experience with cancer. I will let you know tomorrow night what I was blessed with learning as I go through my day with this new information that is also old in my life.
“The first of fear will then be gone and the first will then be the last. The love will be the last of all the fear you had at first.” The Box by Lisa Hynes
Tuesday, August 12, 2014
I have to thank the most special person who made this site possible:
She took my ideas and made them real and now all my dreams are coming true. Go to:
Check it out. I will be having the book printed as soon as I look through the gallery one last time with minor changes.
She took my ideas and made them real and now all my dreams are coming true. Go to:
Check it out. I will be having the book printed as soon as I look through the gallery one last time with minor changes.
Monday, August 11, 2014
To take a past that is full of pain and turn it into the love for who you are at this moment takes several steps that will need to be reviewed every day. The first is to surrender to a force that cannot be explained. Acceptance of this power that is greater than you will require redirecting your thoughts and what you believe is real. To understand that things are not really what you see is, at first, difficult to comprehend. How do you accept that your past anguish was not in vain? How do you accept that all this was a way to reach the understanding that there is Something Greater? The beliefs you hold are your reality and you can choose to dwell on your past and continue to make it who you are today or you can take the humility from where you came from and turn it into the hope of what can come from your past and make it something new.
The day the old way of thinking blends in with the belief that there is Something Greater, the new thoughts will emerge. You will find that you can take the past events that caused such anguish and turn them into the belief that they brought you to this level of awareness and you are forever changed. Your knowledge will expand as you seek for more and Something Greater will emerge into your reality as you turn the thoughts of who you were into the new thoughts. As the sun rises you will see how the new day brings you the opportunity for a new you and as the moon rises, the new cycle will begin.
You then will have a belief in Something Greater and that alone will change who you are because you were who you were and now you know something different. The belief takes the old and turns it into a meaning that you would not have found any other way. That feeling you get with this realization will blend the old thoughts with the new feelings and together they will bring a new spirit into your mind and body. The love will become so strong inside that you will feel it coming out into others without doing a thing. You will then know that you are different, yet look the same.
As you change from the inside-out, your physical appearance will begin to change as well. You will present yourself to others with the knowledge that you are the vessel for this unseen world and you will want to look your best at every moment. As you consciously strive to improve yourself, those around you will notice something different about you. They will not be able to articulate what is different, other than how happy you seem.
You will begin to seek ways to help others who still sit in the corner of their minds full of fear. You will want to show them how they don’t have to suffer with their thoughts any longer. You will then become an example to others as you take the old ways of thinking and blend them with the new feelings you hold that change you from the inside-out. The feelings will wash away all your anguish and bring you happiness for what you have found in your desperation.
The old thoughts will then become the foundation for the new thoughts and together they will stand strong for the new you. It will all start with the feeling you will get on the day you realize there is Something Greater and you are right where you are supposed to be in this bigger plan.
What could this bigger plan be that brought you to such desperation? This gift is only given to the chosen. Those whom Something Greater has chosen to travel a path of creation will be shown glimpse of this unseen world. Some never experience this unseen world and go through life to never venture out into the magnitude of what lies within our view. The gift of desperation forces us to break through fear to find Something Greater. The only way to understand what it all means to you is to look inside the part of you that yearns for something more.
We are here because we are chosen and those who think this existence is a random occurrence have not reached the level of awareness to know the difference. The knowledge will come to all and all are right where they are supposed to be. All the pain and anguish is necessary to reach the awareness that you do not have to suffer so you can understand the difference. This existence is the way to a greater understanding of your part in the universe. Your presence is needed and there will come a day when you will understand the magnitude of who you are and who you are becoming.
As you look at who you are at this moment, the beauty can shine through for you or you can choose to sit in the darkness of your mind until your time in this body is finished. Your fears create your misery and your love will make you new. The old thoughts will then fuse together with the new thoughts and you will not remember where one starts and the other ends.